If you are still in contact with these two folks in any venue (Live Journal/e-mail/etc), please ask them to contact me. They are among those I have lost contact with and would like to reconnect with if it is at all possible. Whatever it was that I did to break the friendship, I would willingly apologize for, it has been hard to lose a friendship of this long a duration and I find that I miss them more as time goes on.

Profitne/Tinne

Poll #1209156 Live Journal and real life losses
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

Journal had a cost for you in real Life?

If so, what was the trouble/cost?

Would you amend or withdraw the entry if you could?

Was the trouble/cost worth it in the loing run - six moinths or longer?

No, not as bad as losing a job.

There are quiet hidden corners of the world interest communities that sometimes have LJ intersections. One of these was a still quiet haven I enjoyed for years - probably seven or so, and I had a dust up with a member of that community. I felt for his/her peace of mind I had to leave that community - and it was a hurt feeling that tore me apart so badly at that feeling that I still cry late on many nights thinking about the folks I lost connection to when I had to withdraw. I loved some of them like brothers and sisters, met a number of them face to face, and the loss of their e-mail presences was like losing some of them to a death as real as if they had indeed died in reality.

Moreover, when I was so deeply exhausted with the beginnings of the Multiple Myeloma I was diagnosed with last June, I was caught up in a second dust-up with another person that I had known for many years - longer even than the members of the quiet hidden community - and I posted about that second one in my LJ. It caused members of the hidden community that I was still in contact with to drop me as a 'friend' on LJ. So I lost all touch with them. And with the death of my cell phone this last spring I No longer have the phone numbers for the ones I would still like to call and talk to if only they would talk to me.

And in the end: I wish I had gotten in neither dust-up, I would beg forgiveness from either group if they would accept my apology, and I will miss both groups of people and the members until I die.

But most of all I miss the quiet hidden community and ALL its members more than I can say, more than I can express, and more than my heart can hold.

Profitne




;) Susan : ) Zsuzsa ;) Profitne :D Tinne : ) Laughter Heals :D

I have listened to this piece twice this afternoon. A regional quality CD version, and it still kicks ass! If I had the energy to walk across the room I have a copy of Seiji Ozawa's version, Solti Georg's version, and Gerard Schwartz's version - all better, but all on LP.

Why do I have so many versions? The Fourth Choral Movement. ( Read more... )

But I also remember enough of my high school German to find myself drawn again and again to the ideas written into that chorus in the fourth movement. So many people don't bother to read it in translation, they miss how highly inflammatory and revolutionary - in the truest senses of the word - it was when this piece was first presented and that chorus rang out joyously and powerfully for that first audience. It literally overwhelmed them. ( Read more... )

But if you don't have or can translate it for yourself, find a copy of those words in translation. Look at them, not just from the persepctive of our world and time and how far we have to go to reach the ideal presented there, but think how on the date the first concert of this was given how absolutly mind blowing and revolutionary this was for the average German, Magyar, Czech, Slovak, Croat, French, British, Russian, Italian, Dutch, Spanish, Swedish, Norwegian, Finnish, and other citizens of the monarchies and republics of the time would have been affected by these words.

Oddly enough, when a friend recently asked me how I could have remained hopeful after all that's gone on in the world and my life since September 11, 2001 I reminded her how what is at the heart of that music and chorus is the heart of how I can be a (gasp) Liberal, what it is that is the most dangerous to the minds who want to establish Islamic Fundmantalist states, it is why I know that unjust governments will be overthown eventually, why I have not despaired about humankind.

We may not hold the ideals in that chorus daily at the front of evey action we take as individuals, communities or nations, but in many nations of the world we do believe these ideals are among the best and brightest at the heart of our firmament.

Profitne

http://www.wheresgeorge.com/ybd.php?args=bb0796fc455b7a8ff37366bbcdc255090c187d280bcecaac84a49ea4663013859e38000bb1bf512361e9db198da7f5cc18c3d18eb856bad498298d36edfa3182ddd22d979d1ac83a435dcba41e70b42661717822c53185c0136ea54c2ef25eb7

Wow! My first day to get two bills entered in one day, and I get two new States too. This makes it over the halfway mark with 26 states. Bounces Bounces

Profitne

Virginia B. from the Northwest Regional Spinners Association brought this antique Bavarian Parlor Wheel into this afternoon's spinning circle. She is an older woman looking to downsize her collection in preparation for moving to a smaller home. I offered to take digital pictures and put them up on the web for her.

According to her, it was made between 1850 and 1880, and was refurbished by Mr. Antoine, a woodworker I have had independently recommended to me by the staff at Woodland Woolworks (http://www.spinology.com) for his excellent work. It is light, has a small footprint and I have taken these photos in front of skeins of yarn to give people an idea of the size of the wheel.

The clearest picture of the whole wheel ( Read more... )

Please note, I am not the person selling the wheel. If you are interested, please contact LVSPINROCK@Juno.com for specific details like price, dimensions, etc. If you are not interested, but know a spinner who might be, please give them the link to this post and her e-mail address.

Profitne

I attended my father-in-law's burial service at the Mt. Tahoma National Cemetery yesterday. Most of the ceremony was by the Intertribal Warrior Society, and I was deeply impressed by how these amazing volunteers served the deceased service men and women. But when I tried to find an address, a URL, a website for them so I could make a donation - I couldn't find the branch here in the Pacific Northwest.

Would those on my friends list who are vetrans or are in contact with the First Nations please contact me if you have any idea of how to reach this organization?

Profitne

October 1st from 2-4pm is the next gathering of the spinning circle at Renaissance Yarns in Kent, WA. If you would like to join us, their website http://www.renaissanceyarns.com has an address and phone number for directions.

Bring your spinning wheel or drop spindle and fiber, there is space for up to 10 spinners and it is free.

Profitne

Starting this week, the first and third Sundays of every week we will be having informal spinning circles at Renaissance Yarns here in Kent, WA from 2pm until 4pm. It is free, but there is only seating for 10 people. In months where there is a holiday or a fifth Sunday we will figure it out as we go along.

http://www.renaissanceyarns.com
207 East Meeker Street
Kent, WA 98032
253-852-YARN

Bring your own wheel or drop spindle, fiber and I look forward to seeing you there. You can get there by Metro Bus, or call the shop for directions if you are interested.

Profitne

http://www.wheresgeorge.com/report.php?key=1770fd2a95e6df5243c608ad919e853581d73ff510a79a5a&entcnt=2

Okay, fellow Georgers, just how hard is New Mexico to get? I was told that Hawaii, Alaska, South Dakota, New Mexico and Colorado were all hard to get from other Georgers, but I got them so I'm a bit confused. Wyoming, I would expect to be tough due to the low per capita per square mile population. But how tough is New Mexico really?

Profitne

http://www.wheresgeorge.com/report.php?key=ac524b4f46d99bb347a557ae4e6e189cd702ae7aeb0ef829

Wow, this is exciting, this is my first International George. Bounces, Bounces.

Profitne

I have been given as a birthday present. Or rather one of my georges from this summer has.

http://www.wheresgeorge.com/report.php?key=3ae24d2c73604d238c27d42c257d8f892b7dd49ba32015d7

'Course I don't understand why the one who gave the gift and obviously knows about Georges didn't sign it in, but this is the first Birthday notice I've received.

Profitne

I have just entered my 500th Bill! Not a milestone I expected to reach this soon (I haven't even been George-ing for two years yet) but a fun one nonetheless.

Profitne

My grandmother-in-law passed away yesterday morning. She was 100 years old, had twice beaten breast cancer, had raised four daughters in the depression, had been married for 69 years to her husband who passed away a couple of years ago, had knitted caps for premies at a local hospital for over 15 years and will be missed by a very large entended family.

Although I was not her grandaughter by blood, she has been a part of my life for 25 years, and I will miss her.

Profitne

I have not been on LJ for a couple of days.

I did attend the Yoga for Grief class, and got something out of it. But I also had a back that was out of position and it took Monday's yoga class to get it mostly back in place. Tuesday, I went to bed early under the influence of cold medication, only to be wakened by my Aunt-in-law telling my my 100 year old grandmother-in-law was in the hospital with pneumonia. I bailed on yoga class last night to do the same again, complete with another phone call telling me that GIL now had congestive heart failure and wasn't responding to antibiotics.

Today I went to the dentist and got home to another call saying they were going to take her off life support tomorrow if she doesn't respond to antibiotics and no one expects that she will.

I'll tell more about the yoga for grief class when I am feeling a bit better.

Profitne

I am thinking it may be time this coming spring to rename my LJ. In February it will have been 3 years since Bill died. It is and always will be part of my life and reactions to things that I was widowed at a young age. But it may be time to start turning to a less obvious form of grief in my life.

Poll #646518 Renaming my Journal
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

If I were to rename my journal, what part of my personality do you think should be reflected in the new name?

If you answered #1, what name would you give it?

Profitne

Today my birthday shipment from http://www.dharmatrading.com arrived. Except for the two nightgowns (BR8) all the rest was gear for the yoga class that starts on Monday.

I couldn't wait to get to my break to try on the sports bra - I've never had one in my life and I didn't know how they fit. And the rayon pants (BR16) - I don't think I own any pants at all and the instructor says I will need them. Okay, I'm not going to be a fan of sports bras, but it will do. And the pants fit me like pants and I dislike the fit of most pants.

But I also got a silk and velvet poncho to dye for the meditation period at the end when you get a bit chilly according to the instructor. I am dithering if I should start dyeing it tonight, or wait until after I get home from the Spiro's Greek Island restaurant tomorrow night. Hmm, decisions, decisions. Anyway, it will be either teal blue and midnight blue or just teal blue when I do dye it.

The second fun part of the day came when we were riding to the train station from work. Traffic was awful, worse than most holiday friday nights. We missed our train. One of the drivers invited the other two of us to join her and her partner for dinner. They had a fun restaurant they used to go to in the Seattle area Zao's Noodles, and by serendipity they found that another branch of it had opened up in the new mall in Kent four blocks from my place.

So we all went out to dinner and I had great Chinese/Thai fusion food with NO MSG! Bounces bounces bounces. Far too dangeorous to my budget to know about this close to home. The driver's partner and I were both convinced we knew each other, but not from where and try as we mnight we could not figure it out. But it made for fun conversation. At the end of a truly grat meal, we all got 'mystic fish.' You place these in the plam of your hand and see what it tells you. It tells me I am in love. Either that or I am generous.

Okay, if I am in love I'd like to know who with. The only thing we could come up with was my cat, and while I adore the little muggins, I'm not sure that is exactly what the fish was telling me. If I am generous, well, I don't know about that either, but I am a watery Capricorn so may I skew the fish oddly too.

Profitne

This is actually a bit of a misnomer. There was a series of posts I deleted from late summer to mid-autumn for legal reasons that are not included in the stats. Bus such as they are, here they are:

Date created: 2003-12-13 21:31:27
Date updated: 2006-01-03 05:31:12, 1 day ago
Journal entries: 344
Comments: Posted: 602 - Received: 630

Yes, mother, I do spend more time on-line than you would like. But it beats hanging around in bars.

Profitne

I started the new year last night with a midnight wedding. ( Read more... )

I was home by 1:14am. The bride had been concerned about us getting home with a road full of drunks, so I gave her a call to let her know we made it just fine. I think my friend - who cleans the daycare the bride and groom run - told her it was my birthday because when I called to let her know we had arrived safely she wished me Happy Birthday. That will cut a case of lonely birthday blues I can tell you! :) Didn't get to sleep until after 3am, and the cat woke me up at 8:30. :(

Hoping against hope, I called the Wildwheat Bakery - they were open, so I had my usual Sunday morning breakfast. ( Read more... ) they have a twice weekly beginner's yoga class and a series of classes for grief work on Saturday evenings I am going to sign up for. Time to go online and order yoga clothes today too I think.

Profitne

This was a busy weekend. Mind, I don't mind any of it, but couldn't my relatives spread it out just a wee bit? I mean one group of relatives a weekend is just about right.

Thursday, I was invited to attend a play dedicated to my late husband. ( Read more... ) but I felt much more welcomed in that place than I have in a long time.

Friday was the funeral of my cousin's father - actually a cousin himself but I called him 'Uncle' for cultural reasons. Since I have not passed my 90-day probationary period, there was no question of taking time off to attend a funeral of an extended family member. ( Read more... )

Got up Saturday, did my chores and got ready for my mother, step-father, sister and niece to go out and celebrate mother's 72nd birthday. ( Read more... )I was home by 10:30 but there was one more day to go. Sunday we helped my grandmother-in-law celebrate her 100th birthday. ( Read more... )Honey asked where Bill was?

Of all the things I didn't want to have had her ask, of all the things I didn't want to have to tell her, that was it. ( Read more... )

Among the people was the woman who'd insisted Bill was her guardian angel and still stops by daily? She was telling me she was so very very sad he was unable to attend, but he'd told her..... and I just got up and left the room because I felt like decking her. ( Read more... )

Mind, I don't object to doing things with the families, but couldn't they have spaced the things out a bit? Grumble farch grouch, snore......

Profitne